There is a perfect symmetry between our own personal growth and the friends that we have in our lives. At any given time we can look towards our friends for a clear assessment of where we are at – mentally and spiritually.
From early childhood – right up to our adult years, the company that we choose to keep represents our ideas and reflects how we see our place in the world to be.
From the ages of 5 to 11 – it all comes down to balance. At this age children have a tendency to befriend others that come from a different background and social standing. They feel that friendships are possible with everyone, and are drawn to others out of a natural inclination, as a way to experience new things that they cannot experience at home, in order for them to grow. Children like whom they like – and in their infinite wisdom they see no barriers of any kind. Not only is this necessary, but also by doing so, engages the larger community by these small actions alone. A lot can be learnt from the early years of a child’s development, for their intent is pure and unwittingly calculated with their best interests in mind.
As we get older – especially in our teenage years – our first found friends drop away – to be replaced with others that are more of an equal match, and more like-minded towards testing new boundaries. We are drawn to others like us in situation and opinion. It is a way of understanding where it is we have come from. These are the years that children begin to move more independently from their parent’s ideals and ideas, all the more ready to form their own opinions and their own ideas about what they choose to accept as reality.
Once this forming of the mind takes place- once again, old friends drop away and new friendships are formed – coinciding with growth and a clearer picture of what it is that we deem to be right and wrong, acceptable and unacceptable.
The changing of friends does not stop here – for as a young adult we are not quite set in stone and the friends that we have in our early twenties are helping us to fine tune our belief system towards the next area of growth.
It is not until our early thirties that we can safely say that the friends we have now – are the ones that we keep forever. For many there will be friendships that have stood the test of time – friends reconnecting after time apart – they too have come to the same conclusions about what it takes to live a happy and meaningful life.
Every friendship that we have lost along the way will hold a warm place in our hearts and we will find our selves giving thanks and recognition for being there with us in times of growth and learning.
Then there is the common theme of friends who make appearances throughout our lives – spending a month or two – or a year or two – then vanishing – only to meet up again further down the track. This is pivotal in the fact that certain people will only appear in your life at certain times according to how well you are doing mentally. If you give it a moment’s thought, you can safely see that when everything is going well and you feel that you are the best you can be, certain people reappear and are once again a part of your life. These are the people that you think of with no regret, who are confident and successful in their own right.
The same goes for the times that you need a push in the right direction- there is always that one friend that turns up right on time to help you through, and then leave when you are once again on track.
Friendships are a beautiful way to look back on growth – and a great way to recognise balance in the here and now. Thank your friends from time to time, like you, they have no idea just how important they are.